Brick on Wheels

Every great road trip begins with a great car. Before you mistakenly think that the commercial above suggests that I think the Nissan Cube would be a "great" car, please read the post below:

My mom decided to rent a car for our 14 hour drive to Seattle. She splurged and ordered a full size car to ensure the little baby would have cruise control. You see, if you get a compact car, that's not guaranteed, and let's face it--14 hours of driving with NO cruise control isn't pretty (trust me, I U-hauled it from Utah to North Carolina, remember?). So, I go with mom to pick up the car, she signs the papers, and we drive away in a Chevy something. Only problem is, Chevy-something's cruise control doesn't work. At all. My mom calls Enterprise, who tells us to come back and they'll see what they can do.

When we arrived and it was confirmed that nothing could be done to remedy the broken cruise control, we were told that there were two other vehicle options for us to consider: a two-door Ford Mustang (hmmmmm four adults, essentially no backseat) or a Nissan Cube (hmmmmmm atrociously ugly and sure to get a lot of unwanted attention on the freeway, with the added bonus of a HUGE crack in the windshield right in the driver's line of vision). We weighed our options and decided to go with the Cube. Our pride was worth less than our leg room.

Now, previous to this excursion, I had already heard of the Cube via all of the obnoxious commercials on Hulu (see above video). The commercial makes the Cube seem like this trendy, ultra cool vehicle that will make even the lamest person become worthy of starring in an ipod commercial by the time a drive to the grocery store is done. I didn't buy this concept when I saw the commercials, and I didn't buy this concept once we got inside.

The reality that is the Cube doesn't include sliding into parallel parking spaces and arriving at a chic dance party with friends. The reality that is the Cube includes a caravan of army men laughing and pointing at you when you pass them on the freeway, old men at gas stations giving you strange looks, so much road noise you have to shout to be heard, and your aunt nicknaming it "the brick on wheels." My brother, Jared, captured the reality of the Cube in the visual tour below:

which inspired us to make our own, ghetto-fied Cube commercial upon returning to Utah, shown here:

I think this video is proof of three things: (1) I will never own a Cube of my own, (2) We clearly ended multiple bugs' lives on our trip--I love the close up of all the bug guts on the front of the vehicle, and (3) My family is amazingly awesome--What other 17-year-old do you know who will dance in a gold shirt on camera? What other mother do you know who will sacrifice her reputation with her neighbors to film it? Yup, awesome. Enough said.