Sunday, March 30, 2008

Since When Can't Rain be Moisture???

OK. I really hate to complain about Utah, yet again, but today it is unavoidable. I feel the need to complain. To vent. To wallow in my self-pity. This morning I woke up to get ready for church. Keep in mind, last Sunday was EASTER SUNDAY people. EASTER. As in, it's time time to break out the pastel colors and sandals in the wardrobe. But alas, while I was running around like a crazy person trying to make bed-head look presentable (we are always running late on Sunday mornings) Chad went to the window and informed me that there was about three inches of snow on the ground.

I laughed at this, knowing that, surely, he was just joking. Because, hey, as previously stated, last Sunday was Easter. And you can't wear pastels in the snow. After he coaxed me to come to the window to see for myself, I let out a scream of rage.

When we went to church, all the Utahans were elated. In heaven. On cloud nine. "When I woke up this morning, and saw the beautiful snow on my thirsty lawn, I knew today was going to be a great day," one man said. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME???!!!

Here's the deal. I realize that we're in "a drought." That we need "moisture." (A word that I have never really liked very much by the way. Can't we just say we need water? Or rain?) Anyway, I realize the need for something falling from the sky to give us some water. BUT COME ON! Hasn't anyone here ever heard of rain? I love a good thunderstorm. I would adore seeing a light sprinkling, or even a brief downpour, of rain to wash away all the nasty inversion filling the valley and leaving behind a clean, fresh sky. What I don't want to see is SNOW covering the ground 2 DAYS BEFORE APRIL!!! COME ON, PEOPLE!!!

It has yet to stop snowing. Sadness fills my heart.

Thursday, March 27, 2008


Wendi left me some homework, and so here is my completed assignment:

10 Years ago:

I was 14. This meant I was living it up at Stake Dances! Oh the memories. I just could not wait for those, let me tell you. When I think of Stake Dances, a flood of Bryan Adam's songs, Savage Garden nightmares, and "YMCA" start playing on the memory soundtrack. Good times. Honestly though, I loved Stake Dances. My husband apparently hated them, but I just think that's because he didn't have me there to dance with! There were the creepy boys that you'd have to try to hide from on the long songs, but I got pretty skilled at avoiding those ones.

5 Things on My To-do List Today:

Well, let me just list the top five things from my planner today:
1. Make copies for sophomore El Greco analysis.
2. Check out TV and DVD player for classes on Monday and Wednesday.
3. Create rubric for sophomore American Dream project.
4. Call Andrea back about baby shower.
5. Start putting in Term Four grades.

Exciting, no???

Things I would do if I was suddenly a billionaire (I'm going to instead pretend that this means I suddenly have unlimited money that will never go away. I don't even know if billions would be enough for what I'm about to propose):

1. Buy a Jeep Wrangler, which has been my dream car since I can't even remember when, but is the most impractical vehicle I could possibly buy due to outrageous gas prices. But heck, if I'm a billionaire, who cares, right?

2. Buy a flat in London, and a private jet that convey myself, hubby, friends, and family there whenever we feel like a stroll through Kensington Gardens and a Flour Power brownie at Borough Market. The private jet would also fly us to other fantastic foreign destinations at a moment's notice.

3. Pay off my student loans. Yes. I have those.

4. Buy a beach house on Emerald Isle and decorate it beyond fabulously.

5. Buy and decorate my dream house. (Complete with circular driveway with fountain in the middle and cascading wall of water in the foyer.)

6. Go get my master's degree.

7. Donate money to some amazingly good causes.

8. Buy commercial real estate property. (Wow, have I become Chad's wife, or what?)

9. Buy a yacht and sail the Mediterranean. (The yacht will come in handy when flying places on the private jet gets old.)

10. Go to New York City, call Stacey and Clinton (who will, of course, want to be my friend since I have billions) and go on a shopping spree with their guidance.

11. Buy a library full of first editions.

12. Buy Chad his Porshe 911 Turbo GT2 so that we can drive around the countryside together. I will wear a big Audrey Hepburn hat and sunglasses while doing so, of course.

Hmmmm...that's not all, but it's a good start.

3 Bad Habits:

1. Worrying too much.
2. Complaining about my job.
3. Road rage towards Utah drivers.

Places I Have Lived:

Moses Lake, Washington; Bountiful, Utah; Provo, Utah; London, England; Orem, Utah; Kinston, NC

Jobs I Have Had:

My first job at fourteen was weeding sugar beets. I did this bare-foot while I squished potato bugs between my toes, because I got blisters when I tried to wear shoes. I know...not a pretty visual. It was not a pleasant job, but I did it with a few friends and so we actually had a lot of fun together. Plus, I thought I was rolling in the dough by the end of the summer! In high school I also worked for my parents' garden/reception center and cleaned a dentist office and an orthodontist office. In college I was a waitress at IHOP (breakfast food is a white-trash magnet. They swarm like flies over pancakes and bacon..that's all I have to say), worked as a receptionist at a mail center, processed express mail at the same place a year later, and eventually worked as a beggar for BYU (called alumni and asked for donations, and eventually became a supervisor at the call center). I teach high school English.

Thing Most People Don't Know About Me:

This is a hard one. I feel like I'm not very secretive, and so most people know about me. But I shall try.

I love to write and want to publish a book someday.

I want to be a stay-at-home mom someday.

I am a little bit OCD about certain things. Particularly about the way things are cleaned.

I love music. I play piano, guitar, and sing.

I am a perfectionist.

I am Obsessed With:

Gilmore Girls. I HAVE to watch the re-runs every night at 6:00. I know, I know. I'm pathetic. BUT I LOVE THE SHOW! I love the fast-paced dialog and the constant references to literature and pop-culture. I feel smart when I watch it. Right now I am a little distressed by the fact that I missed it tonight, but since Carolina was playing I took one for the team.

Blogging. Even when I go through a lapse where I have no time to blog, I am still READING blogs like crazy.

SHOES. Oh my, oh my! I do love me some shoes! But, despite what my husband may tell you, I really have cut back on my shoe fetish since getting married.

Thrift Stores: I love thrift store shopping, or really just finding a good deal anywhere!

When I was young I wanted to be:

A veterinarian. Which is INSANE! I don't even like animals! Go figure, huh?

So there you go, a little bit about me! I tag...Anyone who's feeling like they need something to write about!

Monday, March 24, 2008


Hello, my fellow bloggers. I know you are shocked to see a new post. Many of you were probably thinking I was weren't too far off, but alas, I am alive. All of my zillions of papers are graded. The scores are in the computer. I have only to confirm my grades and I am done with term three forever! HALLELUJAH! I can't believe there is only one left.

We had a fabulous Easter weekend! Even though I was still slightly overwhelmed with school, we added some more craziness into the mix and went to my parents' house this weekend. Chad shot a wedding and I acted as the photographer's assistant. We even dressed the part--black, artsy clothing. I forgot to bring my glasses though, and was very disappointed that I didn't fully look the part of the focused artist.

I've decided a couple of things after shooting this wedding. 1) We make an excellent photography team. I did all of the positioning. As in "Father-of-the groom, let's have you right here, please...very nice...and, just a little to the left for me...there you go, very good" and "Can you give me a big smile, sweetie?! Perfect! Keep smiling!" and "Let's just take that whatever you're holding and put it over here so it's not in the photo, OK?" While I was arranging people, Chad was testing lighting, making sure everyone was actually in the photo screen, etc. We had a lot of fun together. And, I think came across as pretty darn professional. 2) When you are shooting people who aren't family, your credibility goes way up. Suddenly, people see a nice camera, a lighting set-up, and they just blindly trust you. People aren't putting their two-cents in, they just move where you tell them to, and trust you know what you're doing. 3) I am so glad I married who I did, where I did, when I did. The couple getting married are VERY young. It was quite apparent through many of the things said/done throughout the entire wedding process just how young they really are. Even though I got married a lot younger than I had ever originally planned to, I'm glad that I was mature and knew what I was getting into. I'm glad that I found someone I really love, who loves me, and who complements me so well. Sometimes seeing unbalanced relationships can make you really grateful for what you have, lol.

We also had plenty of time for fun with the family. On Saturday night after the wedding, we went out to eat with my brothers and had a lot of fun together. Then, on Sunday, the Easter Bunny brought Rock Band. Now, I am not a video gamer, but this game has convinced me that we need an X-Box 360 and this game. It is THAT FUN! We had a blast playing all together. I thought Guitar Hero was fun...then I met Rock Band. Meredith and Adam, please buy this game so we can come over and play, lol.

All-in-all it was a good weekend. I'm still a little behind with my lesson planning at school, but I figure after this week things should be a lot more relaxed.


Wednesday, March 12, 2008


I am a worrier. I just am. It's part of my nature. It's the end of the term, which means it is a time of intense stress, and thus worry for me. Here are things I'm overly concerned about at the moment:

1. The huge stack of essay tests I have yet to grade.

2. The huge stack of LATE WORK papers I have yet to grade.

3. The huge stack of book reports that are being turned in next week that I will need to grade.

4. The huge stack of Writers' Notebooks that are also being turned in next week that I need to grade.

5. The fact that my sophomores are about two weeks behind where I wanted them to be by this point in the term.

6. Knowing that the school year is nearly over (1 term to go!!!) and having no idea how I'm going to get through everything that I need to before it does, particularly because most of my students seem to ALREADY be on a mental summer vacation and it's not even spring yet.

7. Having no CLUE what to do about next year. Am I teaching in Lehi? Am I teaching at all? Is my husband going to be able to find a job?

8. Feeling incredibly guilty that my house has needed to be vacuumed for the last five days and that it has yet to be done.

9. The fact that I have to pay a stinking late fee for the piece-of-crap Jane Austen's Book Club because I forgot to return it yesterday.

10. Is my body ever going to adjust to the new time change? Because seriously...I'M EXHAUSTED!

11. Wondering how I'm going to accomplish everything I need to without a lot of time this weekend, since I'm helping with the Utah State Junior Miss program.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Seriously. I'm going INSANE! All I want to do is call in sick, forget about the papers sending off bad writing vibes from the corner, and curl up in front of the television in my pajamas. Not gonna happen, unfortunately.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Complete Waste of Time

I officially just wasted one-hour-forty-two-minutes-and-thirty-seconds of my time. How? By watching The Jane Austen Book Club my friends. If you want to see it (which, as your friend, I need to tell you--you don't), then do not read this. It might spoil the pure idiocy of the entire film.


I rented the movie because I thought I might be able to use a few scenes from it in my upcoming Persuasion unit. I am going to be incorporating a lot of film segments into the final writing assignment. When I taught Pride and Prejudice last year, I used a few clips from that BYU version from a few years ago. My students really liked seeing the characters transported into a more modern context. I thought this flick might give me a few scenes that might do the same thing for Persuasion.

Unfortunately, unless I've completely misread Austen, and this film is correct, there is no possible way I could ever use this film in my class. According to the film, the tormented love of Anne Eliot and Frederick Wentworth can be compared to a middle-aged couple in the midst of divorce because the husband has decided to be with another woman. A woman who, when the wife finds out about the affair, the husband refuses to give up. These are his exact words, "I'm not giving her up. That's not negotiable." Brilliant. Practically Shakespearean, I know. Anyway, she TOTALLY TAKES THE SCUM BAG BACK! Why? Well, because he writes her a letter of course. And we all know, that is the only reason Anne and Captain Wentworth end up back together, because he writes her a letter. It has nothing to do with the fact that THE SITUATION IN THE NOVEL IS NOT EVEN COMPARABLE WITH THE ONE PORTRAYED IN THE MOVIE!

Oh, don't worry. It gets better. The plot of Persuasion also, apparently, parallels the story of a married high school French teacher being seduced by (and somewhat seducing) her STUDENT! EW! Of course, it all turns out all right in the end, because she and her husband (who has absolutely no common interests with her, and leaves you constantly wondering how in heaven's name they ended up together in the first place) cuddle in bed and read Persuasion together. Thus solving all their marital issues...including her making out with a high school senior in her car and planning to meet up with him in a dirty motel room. (Which was BY FAR my favorite scene in the movie by the way. That scene concludes with her looking at a crosswalk sign that begins to flash "What would Jane do?" No. I'm not joking. That really DOES happen in the movie.)

I understand this one-hour-forty-two-minutes-thirty-seconds disaster is based on a book. Let us hope it is either completely different from the novel, or that the woman who wrote it starts to beg for forgiveness. I'm sure writing such trash purely justifies Austen's haunting her for the rest of her career.

On second thought, maybe there's some hope in this travesty. If an idiot like that can get published, well then why can't I? It's motivation to start scribling again!

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Just Not the Same

I have written a lengthy tribute to one of my favorite parts about North Carolina before, so I will spare you the repeat. It's in my archive if you are dying to read it. The thing I am referring to is Bojangles.

I have been craving Bojangles for about the last three weeks. Well, really, I crave it all the time, but I try not to think of it too often because it lessens my withdrawals. Today, I decided to try to create some homemade Bojangles.

I'm much too lazy to really put a lot of effort into something like this, so I didn't make homemade biscuits or anything, but I did somewhat try to recreate my favorite Cajun fillet biscuit.

I went to Smiths and bought the frozen Pillsbury biscuits (Southern style). This was a tip I got from my mother-in-law, who got it from Prissy. And I'm sorry, even though Chad told me I was being prejudice and only thought they would be better because Prissy said so, HELLO...PRISSY SAID SO. And that girl knows what she's talking about when it comes to things like this!

I also bought some frozen chicken tenders.

I came home and cooked them up.

I even used the last of the Bojangles honey mustard I have been salvaging since Thanksgiving.

I sandwiched my chicken in between two halves of flaky biscuit. I smothered both sides with honey mustard. I took a bite.


It totally wasn't the same.

I so want to be in North Carolina.

The bitter-cold wind that greeted me this morning only further convinces me of this fact.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

And I Became a Traitor . . .

Last night Chad and I went to the BYU vs UVU hockey game. I absolutely LOVE hockey! I don't normally promote violence, but in my opinion, hockey is exempt from the rules of peace I usually prefer. I love to see a good fight on the ice.

Chad and I first started going to hockey games when we were dating...well, even before we were dating. One of Chad's roommates was one of the announcers and knew all of the BYU players, so we were always getting free tickets and seats right next to the penalty box (again, I usually am nice to complete strangers, but strangers in the penalty box are, again, exempt from that rule).

Well, last night, everything changed. We sat on the UVU side. I wore a UVU hoodie. I rooted for the team that was playing AGAINST my alma mater! WHO AM I? A traitor, that's who. UVU won, because I left my cougars out in the cold.

It was still an absolute blast. The place was completely packed, and I only saw one friend from BYU, and thus avoided the harsh scolding I really deserved.

Unfortunately, there wasn't a single fight! I was so disapointed!
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